:/

aenramsden:

adramofpoison:

molliekatie:

femmenerdy:

You know what is always gross - but especially in this context? - trying to police when, how & where a woman should smile.

If I had been abused, you bet your ass my girlfriends would have taken me out and tried to distract me and cheer me up and make me smile and laugh immediately after I told them what had transpired. I feel genuinely, deeply sorry for anyone who doesn’t have those kinds of friends. “The Smile Police” can go fuck themselves.

does….do abused people have to be unobtrusively miserable 24/7? and….not smile??

But don’t you know? An abused woman has no other traits. There’s nothing else important about her; there are no other parts of her life ever. She can’t smile and joke with friends, she can’t have hobbies or interests that don’t relate to her abuser, she can’t relax in a bubble bath or go out shopping or have lunch with a sibling and enjoy herself. She can’t even feel relief that she’s finally pushing her case through the courts or that she’s not going home to an abusive partner anymore. She is and forever will be only the word ABUSED walking around on legs with a bruised cheek, a split lip and tears falling from her eyes, or she’s FAKING THE ENTIRE THING.

And even then it was probably her own fault.

Not to mention that women never smile when they’re uncomfortable or upset or offended. It’s not like society teaches that women aren’t allowed to be angry, aren’t allowed to be miserable, aren’t allowed to be disgusted or fed up or even tired (”smile!” says every hypocritical dudebro who would spout this sort of rubbish at a woman who’s accused her partner of abuse, as he passes complete strangers in the street and thinks nothing of approaching them and making out-of-the-blue demands. “smile, pretty lady! hey, you look hot!”)

For real, though, if she’s smiling? Good. Good for her in getting out of there and not letting it hang over her. Being able to be happy again is the point.